Often those with low self-confidence feel more worthy when they have a significant other to tell them they are.
Having a person to call your “special someone” is one of the best feelings in the world, but is it so nice because you’re truly in love or because your low self-confidence has just risen a tiny bit?
It can be easy to confuse the genuine and authentic happiness brought to you by a specific person, with the happiness you feel when your self-esteem goes up. Are you in love with this person or just in love with having someone to love?
If you find yourself in a relationship that you feel makes you happy for the wrong reasons, here are six signs that may confirm your feelings.
1. You can’t name any unique reasons why you love them.
When someone asks you what you love about your partner you should be able to list some unique qualities that you couldn’t find in just anybody, whether the qualities are funny, romantic or weird. If you just love shallow aspects of your partner such as their looks and the fact that they are there for you and want to be in a relationship with you, that is not enough!
If you ever wonder if anyone else would make you just as happy, chances are you have low self-confidence and you just enjoy having someone to raise it by kissing you and complimenting you.
2. You feel depressed when they leave.
Whenever your partner leaves, you feel depressed and empty. If your partner is leaving for two years to join the army that’s one thing, but when he or she is just leaving for one or two days to visit some family and you fall apart…that’s a huge sign that your low self-confidence depends on your partner in an unhealthy way.
3. You don’t stand up for yourself in your relationship.
Every relationship involves some arguing but when you and your partner have your moments, you always back down and apologize first. The thought of him or her leaving is too much to bare and your self-confidence is low meaning you already feel unworthy of being with this person. You might feel like there aren’t that many reasons for him or her to date you so you can’t anger them as then they might see no reason at all!
4. When they don’t pay you enough attention your self-confidence take a hit.
If your partner is having a stressful busy day he or she may not have much time to talk to you or cuddle with you. As long as this isn’t an everyday thing, it’s really not that big of a deal, however, you’d beg to differ! You take being neglected for a couple of hours very poorly and feel as though your partner has fallen out of love with you. When you have low self-confidence you need to be reminded that you’re good enough, constantly!
5. You always wait for them to make the first move.
Just like in the outside world, your self-confidence in the bedroom is pretty low too. You always let your partner initiate things because you are too afraid of rejection. Though you’ve been with your partner for a while you are never fully comfortable as you still feel there is a possibility of rejection.
6. You’re more involved with their life than they are with yours.
Are you more involved with your partner projects and hobbies than he or she is with yours? This often happens if you have low self-confidence as you are worried that asking anything of your partner will be too bothersome. You’d rather they offer to join you than you asking them, even though in reality they probably wouldn’t mind.
If you’re in a serious relationship and you have low self-confidence it’s a good idea to evaluate what you are actually getting out of the relationship. Are you really in love or is your self-esteem just feeding off of an illusion?
By Lauren G.
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