People may judge you over small things, like how you drive.
This phenomenon is what experts term the ‘spotlight effect.’ People do not typically pay attention to others, especially strangers, but they notice a heap when they do.
It is usually over trivial matters, like whether you bite your nails.
You may not think that trivialities amount to anything, but they have more influence on your life and relationships than you may think.
Why do they have such an enormous impact? Finding out the answer to this question will prompt you to pay attention to your actions. Of course, you should know what these details are.
Why Small Things Matter
Small things do not put your picture up on a billboard, make a newspaper headline, or earn you a million dollars. That said, you should fuss over them because they resonate more than you think they do.
Every action has an impact, no matter whether we know it or not. Think of how a person in the front of a take-out queue takes too long to place an order. Frustration will mount because it delays everyone behind him.
A kind word about a job well done can motivate your colleague to do a better one. Conversely, negative criticism can push him to neglect his work.
Next, people tend to remember everyday details more than unusual ones. When asked, a child would have a better memory of the birthday cakes his mother bakes than an elaborate birthday party.
Also, it is not the big events that shape your character. Instead, it is the minor occasions that make you who you are. The little choices you make define you. If the small things matter to you, you are more likely to stick to your principles when the going gets tough.
Conversely, if you let little details slide, you are prone to compromise anything.
Also, big successes happen because of small things. Sports professionals understand that it is the effort they put into behind-the-scenes activities that matter most. The training schedules and practice sessions they go through are the minor, but significant contributions to their triumphs.
11 Small Things People Unwillingly Use to Judge You
Widen your eyes the next time you eat out because you have an enthusiastic audience. You may not notice them, but people are watching you and critiquing your behavior. These are the things they observe.
1. How you treat service staff
First of all, make inquiries, and you will find that people notice how you relate to service staff. Executives comment that you can tell a lot about a person’s character by the way he relates to waiters.
2. How often you check your phone.
Next, take note of how often you fish your phone out to check it for messages, because you may have others looking at you. People sum you up by how much you use your cell phone. A study found that those who refresh their messages and Facebook accounts less are more stable than others.
3. Repeated, nervous habits.
Do you have nervous tics? Experts suggest that they may point to an over-anxious personality. These habits may also show that you are a perfectionist. Find ways to keep them under control when going for job interviews.
4. How Long you take to ask questions.
You may remember having conversations with people when you could never get in a word because they always talked about themselves. They never ask a word about you.
The number of questions a person asks about you reveals his character. A high number of points to an empathetic, caring person who has concern for others. Of course, it could show that a person is a busybody.
5. Your handshake.
Also, people take note of your handshake. In general, they take a weak handshake as indicating a lack of confidence. While it is not wise to base assumptions on a handshake, it does point to personality traits. A strong handshake shows a confident person who is outgoing.
And then people, in particular employers, sum you up based on whether you show up on time. Being tardy is not advisable because it shows how interested you are in your work. That said, do not read too much into people being late, as it may demonstrate that they have multitasking abilities.
Another small thing that people may judge you on is your handwriting. There are all kinds of false stereotypes about it. Psychological theories abound about what a person’s handwriting shows.
In general, most people believe that the harder you press o a piece of paper, the more uptight you are.
8. Eye contact.
People size you up based on your level of eye contact. It is advisable to engage an audience, for instance, by maintaining it with them. Research suggests that people who make eye contact are at ease with themselves and socially dominant.
Nevertheless, too much of it may seem awkward and creepy. So saying, balance is essential.
9. Nail biting
People may also judge you on a trivial matter like biting nails. The habit may point to a weak personality who eats away at himself. It may also show that a person is highly strung and unable to relax.
10. How you drive
Experts like Michael Price pay attention to a person’s driving because it tells them a lot. It shows how courteous an individual is towards others. Speeding points to an impulsive or anxious personality.
11. How quickly or slowly you walk
Lastly, how fast you walk will show a lot about you. Fast walkers tend to have more anxious personalities than others. Relaxed walks point to an outgoing personality.
In conclusion, fuss over small things because they are larger than you think.
By Michelle L.