Comparing yourself to others can leave you drained, unhappy and ultimately insecure in yourself because you’re looking at the things that they have, that you don’t, instead of focusing on the positives you have yourself.
In today’s society, it’s easier than ever to compare yourself to others around you. Making yourself feel this way has hugely negative effects that you may not even be realising. Constantly comparing yourself to others can slowly eat away at your self-esteem and leave you insecure about things you previously liked.
It can impact your day-to-day life without you even noticing. People you know, people you don’t – everyone’s life seems amazing online.
However, it’s not too late to stop. If you find yourself comparing yourself a lot, follow these simple tips to a happier, healthier mindset:
1. Recognise the signs
As the saying goes “the first step is admitting you have a problem.” Learn to recognise the behaviours that lead you to compare yourself to others. Do you scroll through Instagram, filled with envy that somebody has the exact pair of shoes you wanted but can’t afford?
Do you feel yourself thinking negative thoughts about yourself because a co-worker has just been given the promotion that you were expecting? This will be different for everybody, but recognising that you’re comparing yourself is the first step to cutting out this behaviour.
2. Stay off social media
Whilst this may not apply to everybody, it will certainly apply to a lot. People post the best versions of themselves on social media and very rarely put out something negative – don’t compare your real life to somebody else’s ‘best bits’.
Just because somebody may look like they have a perfect life, doesn’t mean you know what goes on behind closed doors.
They’re probably feeling as insecure as you are and to recognise this is a good step towards not comparing yourself. Or, if you’re going to remind yourself of this fact so you’re not being negative towards yourself because your life isn’t as perfect as theirs seems to be.
If you can’t help but feel negativity when you go onto your Facebook or Twitter account, stay off it for a while – especially when you’re having a low self-esteem day. Spend some time with your friends or family or just simply spend time alone – appreciate yourself more without seeing what everyone else is up to and you’ll feel a lot better for it.
3. Forgive yourself
Perhaps the hardest tip, but the most rewarding. Comparing yourself to others is linked very closely to low self-esteem and regret building inside yourself.
If you start to look at yourself the way you would look at your best friend – seeing positives and building them up when they are down – you will appreciate yourself more and learn to forgive yourself for your mistakes, including comparing yourself to others.
Whilst comparing ourselves is a natural instinct, we must start putting ourselves first in order to preserve our mental health and grow our self-esteem. I’d love to know if you have any tips to add to this list, as comparing myself to others is something I struggle with on a daily basis, so leave a comment and let me know your thoughts.
By Christina L.