A long-term relationship is not something just for the movies. If you want to know how to make a relationship last, you can do it in your day to day life, with easy steps.
When it comes to love, there is no set rule to follow, there are no guidelines that will fit every situation, which is when people get into trouble. However, there are small things that will ensure you are in a relationship that will last.
How to Make a Relationship Last in 3 Steps
1. Evaluate Your Relationship
While this may seem like a tricky subject, it really isn’t. Not only do you need to be in an objective state of mind, meaning you are not dwelling on an argument, and you aren’t doting over a love letter your partner sent you.
The goal is to look at the relationship from an outside perspective. Is the relationship toxic, abusive, or do you feel in any way mistreated? Sometimes, the best thing you can do for a relationship is to take some time to work on yourself or move on.
2. Do Something Fun Together
Before someone says, “I don’t have the money to go out” – that’s fine, light some candles and watch TV together curled up on the couch. If your partner is sad, find a way to cheer them up, even if it means tickling them.
Laughing and having a good time together releases dopamine, which in turn leads to happiness and a stronger emotional bond between the two of you. If you can afford to go out and do something exciting, by all means, do it, but it doesn’t have to be costly to get a laugh.
One of the downsides of a long-term relationship is that the amount of conversation can suffer. When that happens, you two will feel distanced. The only way to close that rift is to talk and put your emotions and cards on the table; it is time to open up again.
It can happen without notice until one day you are yelling at each other over small things that could have been resolved peaceably if you two had simply said how your day went.
If You Want to Make Your Relationship Last, Avoid These 7 Things
No matter the relationship, sometimes we tend to say things we regret. We ruin friendships, long term relationships, or we step off on the wrong foot for a budding relationship.
While every person is different, there are some very central ideas that you should never say or do if you are trying to make a relationship last.
1. Avoid Setting the Relationship Up For Failure
We all come with baggage, no matter what age we are or how many relationships we have been in, there is a past we are carrying. One thing both parties need to realize is that this new relationship is not like your last one – this one can be different as long as you understand what went wrong in your last one.
Hopefully, the time spent on these relationships has allowed you to gain the upper hand and make the changes you may have needed to make.
2. Never Threaten to Leave
If you are saying that you will leave your partner, how do you expect them to want to stay with you? If you are making them feel insecure, they will go to a place where they feel safe. As human beings, we require stability for personal growth. When it comes to a relationship, you have to harbor those good feelings.
3. Stop Name Calling
The heat of the moment seems to take us all from time to time, but those words you call your partner stick. Not only are you making yourself look bad, but you also make them feel even worse. In a reasonable argument, name-calling will only make the issue worse and reduce you to childish means.
4. Don’t Even Mention Family
It is wise to bite your tongue when it comes to family. Let them vent about them, your partner can call their relative’s names, berate them, and so on. If you do, that is an immediate cause for an argument. Think about it. In school, you always got defensive over your parents even if you hated them.
Same thing. Now, you have your partner, the one you are spending your life with, crossing that line. It can be hard to deal with and better just to avoid badmouthing your in-laws in all circumstances.
5. Keeping A Tight Leash
While it may be cute to go everywhere with your partner, you need to make sure they have their own space too. Let them have a night with the guys or a day out with the girls. We all have our own needs, and when you spend all your hours with your partner, it can cause them to tire of you, or just a lot of the things you do.
If you think your partner is snapping at you, see if they would like some time alone with friends. After all, it is better to let them vent and come home happy and ready to discuss the issues.
6. Insulting Their Ways
I am going to overlook the relationships that have only been established for less than six months. After this time, you know the person. You know their routines, you know when they are hangry, and you know that they may not double flush the toilet when they need to.
If these issues haven’t already been addressed, you cannot continue to yell at them. If they never cook, and it bothers you, try involving them. Avoid using negative connotations when using words like “never” and “always”. Try to keep it positive.
7. Not Acknowledging Their Emotions
Nothing is worse than allowing your walls to crumble, and you pour out your heart to your partner, and they brush you off or fight you on how you are feeling. Sometimes, you just need to allow them to cry and get their emotions out.
In the meantime, be supportive and respectful. There will be times where your input is needed, and other times, a tight hug will do all the speaking that needs to be done.
Relationships are constant works in progress. Each couple has their own dynamic. Some are explosive; others are the tranquil duo. No matter where your relationship falls, know that it is something special, and with the commitment, you can fix any situation you may be in.
Relationships are a full-time job; they require daily work and dedication. However, they are rewarding for as much as they are challenging. With both parties pitching in, you can learn how to make a relationship last and achieve a deep emotional connection.
Not every relationship will be perfect; there will be ups and downs, but it is how you and your partner stick together that will determine the true fate of the relationship.