{"id":20649,"date":"2016-10-28T14:29:26","date_gmt":"2016-10-28T11:29:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lifeadvancer.com\/?p=20649"},"modified":"2020-08-23T21:03:36","modified_gmt":"2020-08-23T21:03:36","slug":"date-person-accepts-the-way-you-are","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lifeadvancer.com\/date-person-accepts-the-way-you-are\/","title":{"rendered":"3 Reasons You Should Date a Person Who Accepts You the Way You Are"},"content":{"rendered":"

Why should you date a person who accepts you the way you are? Well \u2013 the way you are can mean different things. There are a few possible scenarios. We should be clear about which one we\u2019re in before proceeding.<\/p>\n

Scenario #1:<\/h3>\n

You\u2019re with someone who doesn\u2019t accept you the way you are because you behave in an unacceptable manner. You have a wandering eye….you drink too much….you act out\u00a0– that kind of thing. You recognize this, and you admit that you could benefit from making a few changes in your lifestyle and behavior (for your own good, not just for your partner\u2019s<\/em>).<\/p>\n

In this scenario, I\u2019d say go ahead and make the effort to improve<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Scenario #2:<\/h3>\n

You and your partner are perfect for each other in terms of your personality and values. Nevertheless, there\u2019s some external problem or limitation imposed by reality. In this case, you should struggle as much as you both can to overcome those limitations<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Or, alternatively, if they can\u2019t be overcome, accept the tragic nature of the situation, and look upon it as an experience in a true romance that our poets and playwrights have mused upon throughout the ages.<\/p>\n

Scenario #3:<\/h3>\n

Your partner doesn\u2019t accept you the way you are, but because of things, you can’t help. Your personality, your appearance, values that are close to your heart. If you’re in this scenario, read on. You might end up explaining to your partner that it\u2019s time to say goodbye. And you\u2019ll feel better for it in the long run.<\/p>\n

I know, you can\u2019t imagine feeling better. I\u2019ve been there.<\/h3>\n

One relationship<\/a> I had, when I was in my third year of university, caused me nothing but turmoil. He was good-looking, charismatic, charming – a strong personality. He held\u00a0firm ideas of what he wanted and didn\u2019t want.<\/p>\n

I really didn\u2019t have a \u00a0single firm idea in my head back then, and I was captivated.<\/p>\n

It wasn\u2019t long into the relationship when the criticism of me started: I wasn\u2019t this; I wasn\u2019t that. He couldn\u2019t possibly marry someone like me. Feeling dejected,\u00a0I\u00a0started frantically trying to transform myself into this fantasy figure he had in his mind.<\/p>\n

I hadn\u2019t a strong sense of identity, to begin with, but whatever I had started to crumble. I became obsessed with my appearance. Obsessed with always being in perfect shape and perfectly turned out. I neglected everything else in the pursuit of someone else\u2019s idea of perfection.<\/p>\n

It didn\u2019t change anything. The dynamic of the relationship didn\u2019t change.\u00a0The balance of power in the relationship<\/a> was weighted less and less in my favor every time I bent to his will.\u00a0I wasted years of my life and got nothing from it.<\/p>\n

Why date a person who accepts you the way you are? Here are a few reasons:<\/h2>\n

1. You\u2019ll be able to concentrate on your own goals and aspirations.<\/h3>\n

It\u2019s good when someone encourages you to be the best you can be. As long as you still get to be you. Pushing our loved ones to be better is part of what a successful relationship<\/a> entails. However, if your loved one asks you to be things you’re not, or compares you unfavorably to others, then you\u00a0should hear warning sirens in your head.<\/p>\n

We\u2019re gluttons for punishment<\/a> many of us, and we\u2019ll do anything we can to make them love us more. You can try it if you want. But don\u2019t say I didn’t warn you.<\/p>\n

It takes a lot of effort and a great deal of energy to play a role all the time. You\u2019ll be anxious and uncomfortable almost constantly. You\u2019ll be hiding and secretly miserable. And you won\u2019t fool anyone for long.<\/p>\n

2. You\u2019ll have more confidence and be more attractive<\/h3>\n

Clich\u00e9, as it is to tell people confidence, makes people more attractive, it really does. Have you ever seen what happens to a person when they become worn down by a relationship? How they lose their personality? The fact that the only thing that concerns them becomes their relationship?<\/p>\n

How friends, and having a good time start to disappear? How all the things that made them attractive before the relationship have faded, and left a shell of the person that you can barely be bothered to talk to anymore? Yes, well \u2013 don\u2019t let that be you.<\/p>\n

Look at it objectively. Apart from all the burning passion and raptures – \u00a0were you a fundamentally happier and more confident person<\/a> before you met the love of your life? If so, I submit, with no hesitation, that this is\u00a0not the love of your life.<\/p>\n

3. You\u2019ll have your emotional needs met<\/h3>\n

Having your emotional needs met does not mean indulging all your masochistic desires to chase after someone\u2019s affection. Nor does it mean, in case you weren\u2019t aware of it, that you fret all the time in the mirror.<\/p>\n

Having your emotional needs met does not mean frantically trying to change yourself to fulfill someone else\u2019s fantasies. What it means is that you feel secure and confident in yourself and your abilities. It means that you feel loved<\/a> and fulfilled.<\/p>\n

It means that you\u2019re free to focus on aspects of your life other than your relationship.<\/p>\n

Have you ever been in a relationship with someone that couldn\u2019t accept you the way you are? Have you any advice to share?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Why should you date a person who accepts you the way you are? Well \u2013 the way you are can mean different things. There are a few possible scenarios. We should be clear about which one we\u2019re in before proceeding. Scenario #1: You\u2019re with someone who doesn\u2019t accept you the way you are because you […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":20673,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ocean_post_layout":"","ocean_both_sidebars_style":"","ocean_both_sidebars_content_width":0,"ocean_both_sidebars_sidebars_width":0,"ocean_sidebar":"0","ocean_second_sidebar":"0","ocean_disable_margins":"enable","ocean_add_body_class":"","ocean_shortcode_before_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_after_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_before_header":"","ocean_shortcode_after_header":"","ocean_has_shortcode":"","ocean_shortcode_after_title":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_bottom":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_bottom":"","ocean_display_top_bar":"default","ocean_display_header":"default","ocean_header_style":"","ocean_center_header_left_menu":"0","ocean_custom_header_template":"0","ocean_custom_logo":0,"ocean_custom_retina_logo":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_height":0,"ocean_header_custom_menu":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_family":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_subset":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_size":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_unit":"px","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_line_height":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_unit":"","ocean_menu_typo_spacing":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_unit":"","ocean_menu_link_color":"","ocean_menu_link_color_hover":"","ocean_menu_link_color_active":"","ocean_menu_link_background":"","ocean_menu_link_hover_background":"","ocean_menu_link_active_background":"","ocean_menu_social_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_links_color":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_color":"","ocean_disable_title":"default","ocean_disable_heading":"default","ocean_post_title":"","ocean_post_subheading":"","ocean_post_title_style":"","ocean_post_title_background_color":"","ocean_post_title_background":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_image_position":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_attachment":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_repeat":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_size":"","ocean_post_title_height":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay":0.5,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay_color":"","ocean_disable_breadcrumbs":"default","ocean_breadcrumbs_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_separator_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_hover_color":"","ocean_display_footer_widgets":"default","ocean_display_footer_bottom":"default","ocean_custom_footer_template":"0","ocean_post_oembed":"","ocean_post_self_hosted_media":"","ocean_post_video_embed":"","ocean_link_format":"","ocean_link_format_target":"self","ocean_quote_format":"","ocean_quote_format_link":"post","ocean_gallery_link_images":"off","ocean_gallery_id":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[58,46,15],"tags":[18,160,153,194,99],"yoast_head":"\n3 Reasons You Should Date a Person Who Accepts You the Way You Are<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Why should you date a person who accepts you the way you are? 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