{"id":13707,"date":"2015-11-14T18:58:21","date_gmt":"2015-11-14T15:58:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lifeadvancer.com\/?p=13707"},"modified":"2015-11-14T18:58:21","modified_gmt":"2015-11-14T15:58:21","slug":"marriage-do-you-make-these-social-media-mistakes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lifeadvancer.com\/marriage-do-you-make-these-social-media-mistakes\/","title":{"rendered":"Marriage: Do You Make These Social Media Mistakes?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>While social media is often viewed as a way to make new friends with people you have something in common with, a mounting body of evidence is accumulating that social media is bad for people in a relationship.<\/p>\n<h2>Things can get even worse for those who are married because their social media mistakes may trigger suspicion, stir up arguments, and even be grounds for a divorce.<\/h2>\n<p><strong>Although it may sound rather extreme to say that social media can precipitate a divorce, divorce lawyer\u00a0Stephen Bishop explains how it is possible:<\/strong><\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>\u201cRecent studies have found that as many as 1 in 7 divorces these days are caused in part by some sort of social media interaction. In some cases, obsessions with social media lead to divorce. When partners spend hours a day online, instead of interacting with their spouses, families and loved ones, resentment and distance can build, and ultimately, if not treated, that resentment and distance can lead to divorce.&#8221;<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<h3>Why Couples Quarrel<\/h3>\n<p><strong>Arguments may be sparked for many reasons:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>A spouse may send a friend request to an ex-boyfriend or ex-husband, or to an ex-girlfriend or ex-wife.<\/li>\n<li>A spouse may air their feelings about a marital argument in public.<\/li>\n<li>A couple may have a public argument online.<\/li>\n<li>A spouse may do something suspicious like talk to a stranger on Skype or buy a movie ticket without mentioning it to their spouse.<\/li>\n<li>A spouse may know their partner\u2019s password and do a quick check on their social media activities and then confront them about something.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>Unfaithful Behavior Online<\/h3>\n<p>In 2010, the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers ran a survey and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.huffpost.com\/entry\/way-to-ruin-marriages-facebook_n_7183296\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noopener noreferrer\">81 percent of divorce attorneys<\/a>\u00a0traced an increase in divorce due to social media flirting or even affairs. Facebook was the number one site where evidence was found of unfaithful behavior.<\/p>\n<p>Social media is a powerful medium for connecting with people from the past. It\u2019s a way to find many people from old lovers to unrequited crushes. It\u2019s not only easy to find these people, but it\u2019s easy to open up a dialogue and build relationships anew.<\/p>\n<p>When couples don\u2019t get along, <span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">they may find some satisfaction by rekindling a long lost relationship<\/span>.<\/p>\n<p><strong>In addition to easily finding lost partners, it\u2019s often easy to do so undetected<\/strong>. Mobile technology allows privacy, which makes it easier to talk to someone from a smartphone or tablet when out of the house. While there may be shared use of a home computer, everyone carries their own smartphone with them.<\/p>\n<h3>Drop-In Relationship Satisfaction<\/h3>\n<p>Ironically, social media does not improve communication between married couples even though they can now communicate with each other more often away from the house. <strong>Couples may get bored or irritated with each other because of their constant communication<\/strong>. Also, when they spend time with each other in person, they have nothing left to say.<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cCouples who communicate using Facebook could be putting a strain on their relationship, researchers have warned,\u201d<\/em> says an article in the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.dailymail.co.uk\/news\/article-2307224\/Does-Facebook-strain-marriages-Couples-communicate-site-satisfying-relationships.html\">Daily Mail<\/a> entitled <em>\u201cDoes Facebook put a strain on marriages? Couples who communicate on the site &#8216;have less satisfying relationships&#8217;\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>According to the article,\u00a0<em>\u201cOxford University psychologists found husbands and wives who kept in touch using social media had less satisfying marriages. They surveyed the types of social media used by 3,500 couples. <\/p>\n<p>These included Facebook, emails, texts, tweets and instant messages. Those using more than five different channels to communicate with their loved one had a 14 percent drop in average relationship satisfaction.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<h3>A Treasure Trove of Evidence for Divorce Lawyers<\/h3>\n<p>Social media does not only help stir divorce filings\u00a0but is also used by divorce lawyers as a treasure trove of evidence to use against the other party. In the past, <strong>it was difficult to find enough evidence as grounds for divorce<\/strong>. In fact, a person may have had to hire a private investigator to find evidence to use against a spouse in a divorce.<\/p>\n<p>Now, research is as simple as doing a <strong>Google search<\/strong>, finding what <a href=\"https:\/\/www.lifeadvancer.com\/social-media-users\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">social media<\/a> websites they are using, and combing through their social media posts. Since people tend to overshare on social media than they do through other channels, there is a lot of information available.<\/p>\n<p><strong>A variety of evidence can be gathered:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Evidence can be shown to prove that one spouse has more money than they admit to in court. For instance, a husband may claim not to be able to afford alimony, but a woman\u2019s divorce lawyer might show <a href=\"https:\/\/www.lifeadvancer.com\/friends-on-facebook-unhappiness-science\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Facebook<\/a> posts where he is showing off his latest car or vacation.<\/li>\n<li>Evidence might also be as incriminating as the spouse sharing pictures that would suggest that they have been having an affair.<\/li>\n<li>Evidence may show that the spouse has perpetrated domestic abuse, taken illicit drugs, or done something else that would suggest criminal behavior.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>Social Media Is Not Your Friend<\/h3>\n<p>When social media gets in the way of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.lifeadvancer.com\/relationship-expectations-unrealistic\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">a real relationship<\/a>, where a couple spends time with each other in live conversations, it can lead to all sorts of trouble hiding in plain sight. <\/p>\n<p>Conflict in a relationship can arise from saying something indiscreet online to doing something as suspicious as forming an intimate virtual bond with someone from the past.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>While social media is often viewed as a way to make new friends with people you have something in common with, a mounting body of evidence is accumulating that social media is bad for people in a relationship. Things can get even worse for those who are married because their social media mistakes may trigger 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