Marriage is perhaps the biggest decision you ever make. It is about deciding to spend your life with one person, having a family with them, and being a part of their family.
You must be very sure about going ahead, even if you love the person and know them well. Ensuring that you share the same values, beliefs, goals, and plans is the key to finding the right partner you can live with forever.
An honest conversation can give you a fair idea of whether the person is worth giving your life. Here are the things to discuss before marriage that every couple must open up about before tying the knot.
7 Important Things to Discuss Before Marriage
1. Finances
Before anything else, you must be on the same page about finances. Discussing money with the potential spouse may sound awkward, but it is crucial to the success of your marriage. You may not be a billionaire, and you may not expect to marry one.
But both partners should have similar financial goals and expectations for the long haul. Also, decide whether you want to merge money or manage your finances individually. It can prevent misunderstanding and problems down the line.
2. Career
Another fact you must definitely check is a career, even more, if you are a woman and have big aspirations. You will need a supportive partner willing to be your pillar throughout life.
It also enables both partners to have fair expectations when either or both are busy professionals and have career goals for the future.
You may want to delay kids or even not have them just to focus on your careers. It is crucial to have your facts and decisions clear and be open before sealing the deal. Discussing careers and future goals can curb arguments later.
3. Personal space
Marriage is about being together for a lifetime, but people expect personal space when entering the relationship.
You can discuss your views on personal space and alone time before taking the next step. There are chances you may not be on the same page with your partner in this context. For example, couples often have misunderstandings when they want to share passwords of social media accounts.
One partner may see it as a sign of trust, while the other may perceive it as an invasion of privacy. The best way to deal with the differences is by talking it out before getting married.
4. Family planning
When you marry, family planning is a natural progression unless you do not want kids at all. It is vital to discuss your thoughts and plans on having kids and raising them.
Having premarital health checks should be a part of the discussion. It enables you to know your chances or impending challenges as a couple. Be honest about your thoughts on the family to be comfortable about planning it eventually.
5. Values
Honest discussions about your values, rituals, and traditions should also be on your premarital checklist. It becomes even more crucial for couples coming from different religious backgrounds. You may have to embrace each other’s values and religions down the line, so this discussion will ease the journey.
Moreover, these differences may impact your children in the future. You will probably want to decide the values and traditions you want to continue in the family. It is a good idea to find ways to blend your values and traditions, without infringing on each other.
6. Past relationships
Strong marriages thrive on trust, so there shouldn’t be any secrets before and after tying the knot.
Past affairs may make you guilty if you hide them, and it is not a sign of a healthy marriage. Relationship experts recommend that couples open up about their past relationships before marriage. This way, you will not have to worry about the skeletons in the closets.
Moreover, the discussion makes you more comfortable with each other. Even if an ex surfaces later, you can deal with the situation as a team. Such couples tend to live in an easy space because they share every aspect of their lives, including failed relationships.
7. Life goals
Although life is unpredictable, everyone has a vision for the future. Maybe you want to move abroad at some point or live in the countryside after retirement. You may expect to take care of aging parents or adopt kids after a few years.
These life goals may appear far-fetched at present, but your prospective spouse must know about them. Marriage is forever, and your partner will be a part of your life’s goals. So they must know what lies ahead for you and them.
The idea of marrying the person you love sounds exciting, but look before you plunge. There are some unavoidable things to discuss before marriage, and missing out on these important conversations can cause problems and misunderstandings down the line.
Have an open conversation, and you are all set to be a happily married couple forever.
