Whether you’re newlywed or many years married, your sex life is guaranteed to ebb and flow. This process is totally normal and natural, so don’t panic if you’re having less sex now than you were six months ago.
Unless your relationship has recently experienced a major trauma (infidelity, for example), or there’s a medical issue in your way (e.g. temporary physical pain, or a sex drive-reducing medication), your sexual relationship will likely pick back up to its usual pace in no time.
But if you’re looking for a few tips and tricks to ramp things up in the bedroom, read on for five fun and flirty suggestions.
1. Try something new.
Doing something novel with your spouse can shake you out of a rut – and that’s a good thing for your sex life. Try an activity you’ve never done before — whether it’s sexy, like a couples’ massage class, or pure fun, such as a surfing lesson or a horseback-riding adventure and then heading home to bring the exciting energy into the bedroom.
2. Work out together.
Exercise not only gives you energy and makes you feel happy, it’s great for your sex life! Studies have consistently shown that people who work out regularly feel more aroused and enjoy sex more frequently than those who exercise only infrequently. Doing something physical together, such as dancing, biking, or hiking, will give you a sexual boost and also provide an opportunity to shower off together when you get home.
3. Recap your sexiest rendezvous.
When you’re bogged down by work, school, and family obligations, your conversations with your love can start to take an unsexy turn. While we know you have to make time to discuss real-life issues with your spouse, it will benefit your sex life to pause for a moment and change course: think back on a sexy rendezvous you had earlier in your relationship and start describing it (in detail!) to your partner. It will boost your mood and transport you to a more carefree moment in your lives.
4. Talk about your sex life and what’s blocking your libido.
Talking about why you’re not having sex may seem like the least sexy thing to do, but trust us, getting past those stumbling blocks is crucial for a healthy, romantic relationship. If you’re irritated because your partner doesn’t contribute enough around the house, or because you don’t feel like your goals are being respected, that’s going to impact your libido. Clearing the air will help rebuild trust and passion in your relationship.
5. Do whatever it takes to make time for sex.
When life gets in the way of regular sex, you may just need to make a little time for each other. Find a way to clear your schedule for an hour or two and be alone with your spouse. Play hooky for an afternoon and get a hotel room, hire a babysitter for the night, put sex on the calendar so you can look forward to it or be late for work one morning. Force your schedule to work for your relationship. You deserve it!