Introverts are not known for making open expressions of love, or extravagant gestures of any kind.

So how do you know when they love you?

1. They share their interests with you

One way you know that an introvert loves you is that they begin to discuss the things that interest them with you. Introverts are often reticent about sharing their interests with people, as they usually expect that people won’t really care about the things they care about, and they generally decide it’s not even worth the effort.

If an introvert starts to tell you about the things that occupy their thoughts, you know that you’ve been singled out to enter their inner circle.

2. They pick up the phone for you

For an introvert, a ringing phone can be a terrifying sight. Introverts will find all sorts of excuses not to pick up a telephone: ‘I don’t know who the caller is’, ‘I’m far too busy to talk now’, ‘I’m just about to get in the shower’, or my personal favorite: ‘Well I could be out, couldn’t I – what’s the difference?’

If you call an introvert and they always pick it up, especially if they pick up straight away, this is one of the clearest expressions of love you can get.

3. They tell you everything

One of the unexpected expressions of love that introverts use, when they’ve decided that a person is important to them, is to start telling them everything. This strange creature who avoids using the telephone like the plague and seems almost mute in most social situations suddenly becomes a real chatterbox with people they get close to.

Suddenly you find yourself getting several calls a day to tell you the most minor trivialities – what he/she saw on the street just now, what he/she bought at the supermarket. This is a major sign that your introvert is head-over-heels.

4. They accept your invitations to go out

Introverts are famously shy of leaving the house. Being in situations with a lot of people around can be intimidating for them, and they’re also faced with the prospect of it being excruciatingly boring for them.

Socializing is not their favorite pastime and they know they’re likely to end up feeling uncomfortable and barely open their mouths all night. If you ask them to go out with you and they jump at the chance, you know they truly adore you.

5. They become more romantic as time goes by

An introvert’s expressions of love don’t fade over time, in fact, it’s quite the opposite. Introverts differ from extroverts in that bonding with people is far more difficult for them and it happens more slowly. When you know that there are few people in your life that make you happy, your appreciation for them doesn’t wane when the novelty wears off as it often does for extroverts.

Extroverts also know that people are easily replaced with other people, and this is not at all true for an introvert. Introverts aren’t interested in superficial relationships, but in deep intimacy. If you’re special to an introvert, you’ll know it long after the honeymoon period is over.

6. They show interest in you and anything that interests you

If you’re someone an introvert loves and admires they’ll want to find out absolutely everything about you, and they’ll get enthusiastic about anything that interests you. Introverts establish deep bonds with their loved ones. Unlike extroverts, they have very few people in their lives, but this doesn’t mean they’re not interested in people.



They’re very interested in people, but they’re more interested in what is going on inside them than external things. By this I don’t mean only appearances – I mean that an extrovert will generally look at the things that they might do with a partner: do they like to go to the same kinds of places for entertainment? Do they enjoy the same hobbies? Can they travel together?

An introvert will be more interested in thoughts, feelings, and psychological makeup.

7. They’ll always have your back

Introverts are fiercely loyal to the people they get close to. What’s more, they may seem shy, but when it comes to protecting someone they love, they won’t shy away from conflict. They don’t care about pleasing people – they’ve spent a lifetime not mastering that art.

So, if you get into a fight with someone, you’ll know that your introvert is in your corner and there’ll be no mistaking it when it happens.

8. They’ll step out of their comfort zone for you

It goes without saying that when you’re with an introvert that doesn’t mean that you have to become one yourself. You still have social obligations of all kinds, and it’s also important to you that your partner is, at least sometimes, present on those occasions.

It’s one of the greatest expressions of love for an introvert that they’ll put themselves through the torture of socializing with unfamiliar people for you.

9. They show you their vulnerable side

Introverts are masters at keeping themselves to themselves. They’ve had to learn it from a very young age. They have very little trust in other people, and, as a result, it can be hard for people to really get to know them. Oftentimes, introverts come across as ‘abrasive’ or ‘arrogant’ in the way they communicate.

What you’re actually seeing, when you perceive these traits in an introvert, is a very rigid defense mechanism. Once an introvert has become close to you, you’ll see that they have a very soft side, and you will be one of the few people who will ever see it.

10. They keep your secrets

One of the most powerful expressions of love you can have from anyone is pretty much guaranteed with your introvert: they’ll always keep your secrets. They won’t be going out for coffee with friends and discussing what you’re like in the bedroom, and they’re likely not even to speak out when you’ve done them an injury.

It’s always more likely that an introvert will suffer in silence rather than break trust with you – even if this is sometimes to their detriment.

Are you an introvert? Do you identify with the behavioral patterns described?

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This Post Has 3 Comments

  1. Arijit Sayantan Abhirup

    if all the above condition is satisfied for an introvert…then whom do you call extrovert!!!

  2. Priya Patel

    This was an absolutely amazing post!! Wow!!

  3. Robin

    Well, mine exhibits most of these, but absolutely NOT #6. It’s very, very odd. I say he VALUES me, but doesn’t really CARE about me. I’m good because I always show up, and because it’s nice to have someone to DO stuff with. Beyond, that, I have never felt like he truly CARES about me. He is, in fact, absolutely UNINTERESTED in any of the things I am interested in, and most of the things that I do without him. He even said to me once that he wasn’t sure he was capable of feeling ‘love,’ and I have often wondered if this is a result of some enormous hurt that he can’t tell me about, or if it’s possibly a disability, maybe an autism thing of some kind? We get along, we are pretty great, and I enjoy his company, but it’s extremely frustrating. We have only been together for 3 years, I am 60 and he is 70. It is what it is.

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