Saying no isn’t easy to do, and not always the nicest thing. Guess what? There are ways to say no without actually saying the word!
No many things cut as deeply as hearing the word no. It’s a form of rejection to most people, telling them that what they are vying for will just not happen. People are offended sometimes by this word and will try anything in their power to avoid the sting. But there are ways to make this hurt less for those who hate the word. There are ways to say no without actually saying the word no.
How often should we say no?
To be honest, we should be able to give a negative response every once in a while. It’s not healthy to cave in and say yes to everything that we are asked for or asked to do. Without being able to say no, we fall victim to controlling and emotionally draining individuals, even those who do not intend to be this way.
We should practice saying no on a regular basis. Now, I don’t mean say no just to be saying it; that can be rude. Instead, learn ways to say no without actually saying those words, as I have said before. This may even help you get used to letting people down and retaining a clear conscious.
Say no without saying no
So, you get the idea now, right? Saying no without actually saying the word can really be done. This can help you in many ways: work, with children, and even in relationships. So, here are a few ways to get that done!
1. Try Saying Maybe Instead
I know how it feels to let down a friend, especially a sensitive one. Unfortunately, this must be done sometimes to preserve your sanity. If you have many friends or even a few, and you’ve always said yes, then breaking this habit will take some time. For starters, instead of saying yes or even no, try saying maybe.
When you use the word maybe, you allow yourself some time to think things over. Do you really want to do what’s asked of you? “Does the request cause you to be nervous or anxious? If you don’t want to do what’s asked, then you shouldn’t, but in order to save the feelings of your friend, you can use maybe to let them know that you need to think about it. Most of the time, they will forget the request or even ask someone else to do it.
2. Change the Subject
This might not be the best way to avoid saying no, but it does work. Many times, during a conversation, when I have been asked to do something or asked a direct question, I would change the subject. This works so well because it throws the other person off and changes the direction of their thinking, obviously.
You must keep in mind, although, that in order to effectively thwart the request, you must change the subject to something you know will interest or shock your friend. So, you don’t want to say no? Just widen your eyes and tell your friends and something controversial. That almost always works.
3. No Resources
Whether someone asks you for time or money, there are ways to say no without being blunt. If you don’t have time to do things that are asked, then just tell them that your time is restricted. If you don’t wish to give money, then tell them that you only have enough for your bills and cannot spare the extra. It isn’t your fault if you don’t have the resources for what they ask.
4. Saying “I don’t know”
There is no better way to say no without saying the word, then just acting like you don’t know if you can help. This answer can be given with most any request. If they need you to help them move, you can tell them you don’t know if you can, if they ask if you can come visit, you can also say “I don’t know.” This is an amazing way to say no without actually doing the deed.
5. Offer Alternatives
If you realize that you just don’t want to say yes, then don’t. However, you don’t have to say no. Sometimes offering alternative solutions work just as well. If you’ve been asked to go somewhere you find uncomfortable, then try suggesting a different place. If a charity asks you to donate money, then offer to donate time instead. You don’t have to give in, but you can offer a different solution that makes everyone happy.
6. Delay Response
Sometimes when you need to say no, but you just don’t want to, you can delay your response. It’s pretty simple just to say you need to think about the request for a while and you can get back with them about your answer. It’s called “buying time”. This one is even a bit more on the negative response spectrum than saying maybe. In this manner, you are giving them less hope of receiving an affirmative answer.
7. Walk Away or say Nothing
Although this might sound rude, walking away from the conversation gets the point across really quickly. If you wish to say no but just don’t want to vocalize that, then leave the conversation or simply say nothing. Look down at your hands, look away, or even start talking to someone else. This will be abrupt, but they will understand that you don’t want to participate in what they suggest.
8. Just say No
If all else fails, then just look them in the eyes and say the word. Sometimes, you just won’t have a choice and will have to be firm. Saying no directly will let them know that you are confident in your decision.
Saying no is not wrong!
Remember, saying no does not make you a bad person. Many people may try to make you feel guilty or even upset when you tell them no. Make sure you understand each person’s motive behind their request and why they’re getting angry about the denial.
Learn to stand your ground, and each and every time you say no will help you grow stronger in confidence. I would love to hear your ways of saying no! Feel free to share!
By Sherrie H.
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