There is often a day where you can feel a little low, a little disappointed in yourself or have a feeling that you aren’t good enough.
Sometimes it’s hormonal, but for a lot of people, this common feeling of inadequacy is a sign of having low self-esteem.
The feeling that you don’t deserve happiness and you should stay feeling low and unhappy are signs that you need to try and make some changes to your life.
Self-esteem is having confidence in yourself. It means that you believe that you have the right to be happy, to succeed in life, and to have a fulfilled life. The level of your self-esteem will influence and affect every aspect of your life.
Below are some signs of low self-esteem and ways in which you can try to fix it.
1. You always feel a need to prove yourself
You might be the most successful person in your class or workplace, everyone respects you, but yet you still think you need to prove yourself further.
This can actually even apply to friends, partners, and family. If you have a feeling that you still need to do one more thing to show that you’re bright enough, strong enough or good enough this is often a sign that your self-esteem is not as high as should be.
Solution: Sit down and make a list. Make a list of what you need to prove and who you need to prove it too. You then to be a little objective and ask yourself if this list holds any worth, disregard the things that hold no value and instead look at your strengths and start to believe in yourself.
2. Toxic unhealthy relationships
You know who we are talking about, the people who suck your energy and leave you feeling utterly deflated, useless and nervous. These people do not deserve to be in your life! You can’t always control who comes into your life but you can control how much time and energy you give to these people.
Solution: To give yourself a boost, make a list of the thing that you can offer to others, your gifts. Put it somewhere where you will see it every day.
Whenever someone gives you a compliment or says something kind, add it to your list. Once you realize how many wonderful things there are to your personality, you will find it easier to keep good friends close and toxic friends further away.
3. Every setback hits you hard
“Don’t sweat the small things” is easier said than done when the small things hit you hard. When you don’t get a second job interview, a relationship doesn’t work out and you don’t lose enough weight.
All these things are known to really affect you and set you back in terms of your own confidence in yourself. Things happen in life that we can’t control and some things will hit you hard, but if you suffer from low self-esteem these things will hit you harder. Ever think what’s the point in getting back up when you keep getting knocked down?
Solution: You need to try and separate the normal setbacks from affecting your self-worth. If you experience something that isn’t of the norm, join others who are going through something similar as it can help to normalize what you are going through.
4. All your success in life is down to luck
You couldn’t possibly have achieved something down to your merit and ability; it is always down to luck. You think your successes in every element of your life are not because you are talented, dedicated and committed but because you got lucky.
Solution: In order to understand your worth, document how you went about achieving your successes, it may feel a little uncomfortable. However, it will help you see how you achieved your goals with your skills and not by luck.
5. You aren’t pursuing your dreams
Its very easy to dismiss your dreams and put them off for another day. It’s also easy to let yourself think that you will never achieve your dreams so why even allow yourself to dream in the first place. Dreams don’t have to be fantasies that are impossible to reach, they are mere thoughts of where you want your life to go. You don’t want to reach a point in your life where you are full of regret.
Solution: If you are repeatedly daydreaming about what your life could be, try this simple exercise to help you reach your goal.
You are on a train and it is heading towards your ideal/best life. What does this destination look like? Who is there waiting for you? How do you feel when you think about this life? What would you do when you get there?
Once you have envisioned this scenario, write down how you will do it. Even if it is just a small step to get there.
If you suffer from low self-esteem try some of these solutions, they work!
By Holly W.